Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Can you hear me now?

Our cell phone contract is up, so we are in the process of switching companies and getting new phones.  This has proven to be much more annoying than it should be.  Or, maybe it’s supposed to be annoying?  I don’t know.  Anyphone, last night I decided to have a little fun with the pop up chat window on the Verizon website:

 

Verizon chat window:  “Hello, you are now speaking with Robert, how can I be of assistance?”

Me:  “Hey, Bob, what’s up?”

Robert:  “In order to best assist you, can you tell me if you are a current Verizon customer?”

Me:  “Nope.”

Robert:  “What can I help you with tonight?”

Me:  “Well, Bobby, I want you to waive the activation fee.”

Robert:  “I can’t do that.  As a new customer, that is a one time fee you are required to pay.”

Me:  “That’s not true.”

Robert:  “I’m sorry you think my information is incorrect, but there is no way I can waive the fee.”

Me:  “We get a discount through my husband’s company and they told us in the store that we wouldn’t have to pay the activation fee.”

Robert:  “I would encourage you to go to the Verizon store today and maybe they can help you.”

Me:  “Ok Rob, I’ll do that.  I hope they’re open at 11pm because that’s what time it is.”

Robert:  “They won’t be open, but they will be there to assist you tomorrow from 10 am to 8 pm.”

Me:  “Good, I’ll them you sent me.”

(At this point, Shawn is yelling in the background “Just leave the poor guy alone!  He doesn’t want to talk to you!”)

Robert:  “Is there anything else I can help you with tonight?”

Me:  “Yes, Robert, there is.”

Robert:  “Ok, how can I assist you?”

Me:  “You can waive the activation fee.”

(silence)

Me:  “Robert?  Bob?  Bobby?  Can you hear me now?”

38 comments:

Kelsey Claire @Lavender, Leopard, and Lace said...

He should have just waived the activation fee. It wasn't like you were asking for the world. Plus, didn't he want to get you off the phone EASY?

Christa said...

Haha I'm crackin' up over here! I had to do one of those live chats the other night because I'm having problem transferring pics with my digital camera. I hate talking to them!

April said...

Ha! So funny :)

Lindsey and Thomas said...

Hahaha! I love it! Especially all the nicknames you gave him and how he was all formal in return. Hahaha!

Practically Perfect... said...

Don't you just love dealing with large companies over the phone? It's even BETTER when you do it from overseas and they're like, "Huh? Where? New Zealand? Where is that? Ummm, let me get someone to help me..." That's crazy that he wouldn't waive the activation fee over the phone, especially since they were going to do it for you in the store, anyway!

Lil' Woman said...

Lol...Your too funny girl!
Harassing the poor boy...isn't it bad enough he has to chat about Verizon all day...lol

Lori said...

Hahaha! Rob is no fun! He should have waived the fee. I would be a horrible salesperson b/c I would be waiving fees all day long!

Cherry Berry said...

That's hilarious! That sounds like something I would do! We would get along so well!

I'm just the MOM said...

Poor Rob, Bob, Bobby, Robby..whatever lol. I totally wanna do that now. I shoulda did it when I was still with sprint.

Amy Lynn said...

HAHAHA, that just sounds like fun! I might have to go to their site just to harass Bobby ;-)

Natalie said...

I now have something else to do with my time when I get bored.. harrass unsuspecting cell phone reps. That could be an endless amount of fun!

Laura and Ryan said...

Oh I just hate dealing with cell phone companies. I swear they all get together and decide how they can screw with us next. Way to go with Bob, Bobby... That was great!

* Tyly * said...

You always know how to brighten my day, even if it means harassing Verizon reps. Love you and your blog!!!

Hillary said...

You are a total jack ass, I love it!!! Does Rob/bob/Robby/Bobby have your name because there might be a big old red "x" on your file as of today. Worth the laugh though.

One Take On Life - Heather said...

A good laugh early in the AM is always appreciated.

blueviolet said...

You are such a customer service nightmare and so freakin' hilarious!

JENNIFER ♥ said...

That is hysterical!!

Taylor-Made Wife said...

Ha, you crack me up.

d.a.r. said...

OMG next time I have a problem with customer service, I am so calling you.

When we were home for my SIL's wedding last month, we finally hit the AT&T store to remove Z from his parent's plan {yes, shut up, they paid our phone bills...for two and a half years after our wedding...}. Well, since he was only an authorized user and not an account owner, he couldn't remove himself...he had to call his daddy and have his daddy come to the store. I shit you not. I am an attorney, he has lead men in combat and yet he needed his daddy to just remove himself from his family phone plan. I could see maybe if he was trying to upgrade them and increase their bill by $84,000/month, but hell, he was going to be saving them $$! Ridiculous. Good thing his dad's office is just down the street...and we scored lunch with his dad afterwards.

I puffy pink heart cell phone companies!

Meghan said...

You are a customer service master! Seriously, I am always surprised at what cell phone companies WON'T do to keep business.

My hubby gets down and dirty with CS operators too. He once got us free cable for 6 months, plus HBO and Showtime for free:)

Cara Smith said...

You are a rock star!

Ange said...

I need to teach you my tricks to the trade. I always, and I mean ALWAYS get what I want.

Call again, and get the activation fee waived. At the same time be talking to someone in chat. Then ask to speak with a manager in both chat and on the phone.

Then when you have two managers on the line point out that you are talking to both of them at the moment, and that you plan to be on the phone with them for at least one hour minimum, knowing they cannot hang up on you as long as you do not cuss. Then point out the fact that their company will have spent much more that the activation fee to handle your phone call.

Then just say (in a condescending tone of course)

"So, how about we just waive that activation fee?"

(Oh, and try to get an East Indian, and read my blog post about that!)

Semi-Slacker Mom said...

That is why me & you get along so well!

Beth McC. said...

This juast made me laugh out loud!! So funny! Sometimes I do the Comcast chat just to get the all wound up!

Heidi said...

Funniest post to date.

Corrie and Phil said...

Want to come along with us as we negotiate on cars prices? They won't know what hit 'em!

WhisperingWriter said...

Haha.

We had to pay the fee. But we do get a discount since my husband is in the military at least.

Yankee Girl said...

I hate dealing with cell phone companies! I have tmobile and last year they were practically giving away the service to new customers. So I called to see if i could get the same deal since I had been a customer for 10 years. Surprise, surprise, they said no. So I canceled my service (no, I didn't have to pay a fee) and then re-joined at the much better rate.

So unnecessary!

Sara said...

Bahahahahahahahahahahaha!!

Tracie said...

LOL! Those phone reps aren't allowed to have a sense of humor.

Jen said...

This freaking cracked me up. I spit my Diet Coke out laughing when I was reading this. I know I haven't met you yet, but I can totally hear you having this conversation.

Oh by the way, I so excited to meet you and go shopping in a few days!!!

sanjeet said...

You are such a customer service nightmare and so freakin' hilarious!
PPC Advertising India

Erin said...

this cracks me up b/c i spent this morning on the phone w/ banana republic about my bill. they charged me a late fee (when my payments are ALWAYS on time and this once i was like 2 days late and i blame the postal service actually)....after some arguing, they waived it. woohoo!

The Girl Next Door Grows Up said...

He totally could have waived the fee and he knows it. He was just being an ass. So do you now have an iPhone?

Once I was looking at phones and didnthe online chat thing and when I mentioned I was looking at iPhones they waived everything plus said they would one day ship me a Blackberry!!!!

I still went with the iPhone though.

* Tyly * said...

No, you'll totally kick your race's ass. Just don't be a dumbass like me and overdose on sports drinks and gels on an empty stomach. Had it not been for that, I would have kicked my race's ass.

And no, I didn't shit my pants, although it was very close a few times!!! I kept waiting for a shart, but luckily that never happened either. :)

Krissy said...

I used to work for AT&T Mobility as one of their online chat representatives. I have to tell you, there were so many times when customers would log on just to mess with us and I wanted to mess with them back. Haha. Unfortunately, I couldn't because our supervisors review half the chats we do in a night. So there could have been a chance that if I messed right back with the customer my supervisor would pick it up and I'd be fired. LOL But that guy shouldn't just ignore you. We usually have a scripted response if a customer was annoying a rep. :)

http://theartsymom.tk

Krissy said...

OH and one more thing. LOL If you were serious about waiving the activation fee, chat reps can't do it for you. All they have is a screen with a queue for chats and we could see a replica of the screen you're looking at. We can't see any account information. :) You would probably have to call or go to a store for that. Most online chat reps work from their home computer.

http://theartsymom.tk

MrsDixon said...

Torturing the poor boy, I love it! This reminds me of all the telemarketers that would call and ask for my dad, and he would tell them he was just murdered or something horribly awkward!