Friday, November 20, 2009

Can you fart and paint it green?

I was looking through my MySpace blog for a Flashback Friday post for today when I suddenly realized something.  I lied to you on my “30 Things” post a couple weeks ago.  Don’t hate me, I had completely forgot about this revelation I had a few years ago.

Here is your Flashback Friday from April 16, 2008:

When I was younger my aunt used to tell us the most ridiculous jokes.  Most of them revolved somehow around Pollacks (that is a weird word to look at in type, so if you don't know what it means, I believe it's slang for Polish idiots). 

For some reason one joke has always stuck with me.  It's goes like this:

A Swede, a Canadian, and a Pollack were walking in the forest one day when they met a fearsome Troll who naturally wanted to eat them.

"I'll spare your lives if you manage to tell me to do one thing I can't do "

The Swede said : "Look at that mountain. Eat it!" The Troll did and then he ate the Swede.

The Canadian said: "Look at that lake over there. Drink it! " The Troll did and then he ate the Canadian.

The Pollack said: "Can you fart and paint it green?!"

The Pollack was allowed to go on his way.

What does that even mean?  How could you possibly fart and paint it green?  Obviously you can't, but is it funny because it's just so stupid?  I don't know.  Or can you actually fart and paint it green?  Well, friends, today I found out:  YES. YOU. CAN.

Alivia finally (after 2 months) had her appointment with the pediatric urologist.  The doctor was a middle-aged Mr. Rogers type man (but without the child molester under-tones)  who was very nice and thorough.  As he was going through her test results with us, he showed us the pictures from the ultrasound and bladder x-ray (the one with the straw). 

One of the x-rays showed a little of her stomach, he pointed at some black spots that were scattered around the image, and said "See that, do you know what that is?"  For a brief moment I thought to myself "Oh my God, they're tumors!"  Then, he looks at Alivia and says "Those are your toots!"

So, there you have it.  I saw a picture of a fart.  This can only lead me to believe that you can indeed fart and paint it green.  If only the troll had known!


Sorry, I couldn’t do a post without a picture and this is the best I could find.  I promise this is the lowest I will ever stoop to post a picture.


Leah said...

Hi Tami! Thanks for dropping by and joining my give-away. I spent an entire hour going through your blog and it's like 7am here now in Manila. See, I was with you since 6am. Hahaha!
That said, I guess you know that I enjoyed reading ALL the posts.

I thought I've read enough, smiled enough then when I went back to the homepage, I saw this green fart post. What can I say? You started my day right... I guess it's time to get me some breakfast. Hugs!

Hillary said...

As low as it was, I thought the picture/comic at the bottom was pretty funny. Maybe that's because I think you are the shit!

We are going to be back in MI from Wed-Sunday, hope we can catch up!

Jen said...

Yeah, I thought the joke and the little picture was pretty funny! Thanks for the laugh.