Friday, December 4, 2009

It’s beginning to look a lot like shit.

This morning started off smashingly. My husband gets up at 4 am everyday during the week, and then lets the alarm blare in my ear until he “hears” it. Apparently his hearing must be going, because he sure doesn’t fly out of bed like he used to. Did I mention that he doesn’t have to be to work until 7 am? Yup. He gets up at 4 to watch ESPN. Yes, you heard me right, ESPN.

espn-cannot-suck-enough

So, this morning at 6:10 when I heard Lainey yelling “Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!” I thought my hearing must be going because I swear I just heard the shower curtain open and the water turn ON. How is that possible? Someone who has been up since 4, and has to be to work at 7, is just getting in the shower at 6? (I later found out he fell asleep on the couch, which is also common practice.) So, I trudge into the girl’s room, Lainey takes one look at me and screams “I want my Daddy!” Sweet. I’m going back to bed until 7.

Then, at 6:52 the phone rings. It’s Shawn saying he's not sure, but he thinks school might be closed. Apparently, it looked like this outside:

PD*26655540

I turned on the TV, and sure enough school was closed! By this time the girls had made their way into my bedroom and were now throwing a fit about “Now I’m going to miss show-and-share! Now I don’t get to ride home with Julia! I’m not going to get to bring my piece of straw in for baby Jesus!”

Yeah, well, I’m going to miss spin class. Boohoo. Ok, let’s go back to bed. Not. 7:02 the phone rings again. It’s Shawn again. “Yeah, I listened to the radio and Assumption is closed.” That’s great dear husband who is still in his car, because I’m at home with immediate access to television and internet, and I was able to figure that out 5 seconds after talking to you the first time. Surprisingly, I didn’t actually say that, but I wanted to.

Okay, now I’m really going back to bed.

7:50 am: the phone rings again. WTF? It’s my mom this time. “Hi, what are you doing?” What am I doing? What am I doing?! Oh, I’m just decking the halls, making Christmas cookies, painting my nails, that type of thing.

8:00 am: small child enters my room asking for the 100th time when I’m going to get up, when they can go outside to play, and when they can have something to eat. Never. Never to all questions.

8:30 am: I’m up, children are at the table eating chocolate for a snack, and I’m not sure what snow they want to play in because there can’t possibly be more than an inch or two on the ground.

105 days until Spring.

11 comments:

Amy said...

"Never..Never to all questions!"

That is just freaking hysterical!!

How come the hubs doesn't dvr ESPN??? And they replay sportcenter every hour on the hour! 4am...GEEZ!

RN Mama said...

Amy, totally valid points about ESPN, and points that I too have brought up. Maybe my husband will read this and give us an answer!

Leah said...

Hahaha! You are so funny... 105 days until spring.

That's the life of a wife and a mom... I'm also the one being alarmed by the alarm clock in the morning when I am the only one who can stay late in bed. The kids set the alarm in my night table then I have this grand duty of waking them up. They are purposedly annoying me.

jill said...

oh my gosh. poor mama! ummm, i'm on the dvr bandwagon for all the espn mess. you are hilarious. and a better woman than i am. i would totally be drunk. by 9. haha!

Jen said...

Oh my God you crack me up!!!! I MUST meet you!!

Yeah, I'm with you. I have no idea why a person would get up that early just to watch ESPN. I mean come on...it's on a million times a day. Maybe it's a Shawn thing. My Shawn used to get up about an hour before to watch ESPN, but no 4:00am!!

Sorry you had to miss spinning today. That sucks! I couldn't go to the gym the other day and I was just plain pissed about it!

I hope your day gets better and I totally agree with you about winter. I hate it! I don't really care for the snow, it makes people drive like total morans and so help me if somebody smashes into my new car! I also hate being cold, can..not...stand..it!! So you said 105 days til spring?!!

Shawn said...

In a clearly pointless effort to defend myself, I must say that I don't JUST watch sportcenter for the whole time. I sometimes prepare supper, pack lunches, get out everyone's breakfast, get out backpacks, get the coffee pot ready, and other misc things.

And Yes...I have, on occasion let the dulcet tones of the EPSNEWS hosts lull me back to sleep. But this morning I was just not feeling well..and thought going back to sleep might cure my headache.

But, lucky for me, I have an amazing wife that puts up with these things.

Stephanie said...

I have to say that I am very similar to Shawn on this one. I wake up at 5am and I don't have to be to work until 9am. I run Niko, clean, workout, do my nails, etc... during that time. However, when it is cold - I find myself falling back asleep.

Amber said...

I wake up @ 7:05 to have myself and two kids out the door by 7:40, BEAT THAT!!! I stay up til midnight watching all my DVR programs by myself:)

Kristin said...

They weren't excited about missing school??? Crazy talk!

Jenny.Lee said...

Hehehe! ;)

dKo said...

Your blog is hilarious!!