Alivia is the youngest child in her class. I caught flak from a few people when we started her in kindergarten at age 4, but I told them to go to Hell. She turned 5 in November, so no big deal, right? She and I have the same birthday, and I started school at 4 too, and I did just fine.
I honestly don’t even remember noticing that I was younger. Yes, I was the last of my friends to get my driver’s license. Yes, I started college when I was 17. Yes, I had to lie about my age to get my tongue pierced when I was a freshman in college. Again, I don’t remember caring about any of these things.
Alivia, though? She’s pissed. Why? Well, to start, last year in kindergarten they made an “age” graph. They made the graph in early October, so she was the only 4 year old. While that doesn’t sound like a big deal, it was. Trust me, it wasn’t pretty. It was so devastating, it almost ended her kindergarten career. Luckily, the next month she turned 5, and she got over it.
This year, she has a new fixation. Teeth. Yes people, teeth. According to her, she is the only child in her class who hasn’t lost a tooth! I have been hearing about this for months, and then a few weeks ago her teacher had the kids make a diagram of all their teeth. Thus, driving home the point that Alivia is the only one with all her baby teeth. What is it with these teachers and their damn graphs and diagrams?!
Well, guess what? My brilliant daughter has decided to take this matter into her own hands. She now has a wiggly tooth. Unfortunately for her, I am like a secret agent. And, I have discovered that she made the tooth wiggly herself. How do I know this? Well, for one, it’s a top tooth. Your bottom teeth fall out first, it’s like the law. For two, it’s the left front tooth. What does that have to do with the price of false teeth? Well, she’s left handed. Go ahead, reach up and wiggle a tooth. I can almost guarantee, if you’re right handed you’ll wiggle a tooth on the right side, and the same for left handed. Trust me, I did a study.
Ok, so she made her own tooth wiggly, who cares? Right? Wrong. I care. Because if that damn tooth falls out she’s going to have a gap tooth there until that tooth decides it’s time to come in. That could be weeks, months, years?! Who knows?
So, I took matters into my own hands. You see, I have someone on my side.
That’s right. The Tooth Fairy. I told Alivia the Tooth Fairy knows the order in which teeth are supposed to fall out, and she only accepts them in that order. She was skeptical, but I think she’ll come around to it. Why? Well, the Tooth Fairy = Money. And we all know money talks, even to a six year old!