So, there I was at the gym on Monday morning climbing away on my stepper when Chelie (my fav trainer) walks by. “Hi Chelie!", I say. “How was your first spin class?” (She told me last week she was starting to teach spin, and last Tuesday was her first class.) “It was great! Will I see you there tomorrow night?” she says. Oh shit. “Um, yeah, definitely if I can get out of work on time.” Oh. No.
All day at work today I’m thinking about spin. I’m wondering how I can possibly get out of it. I mean, it’s not like I signed up or anything, right? However, I also think I owe it to myself to give it one more try. The class starts at 6pm, so at 4:30 I leave work, figuring it will take at least an hour to psych myself up.
When I get to my car I look in my gym bag and see that I have forgotten my sports bra! Seriously? At this point I think this is a sign that the universe does not want me to spin. I consider my options. Pick up my kids, go home, relax? Go to store, buy sports bra, then head to purgatory? Somehow my car takes me to Meijer, I’m paying for the sports bra, there’s no turning back now.
5:45 pm: I head to the spin room so Chelie can give me a tutorial first. Note to self: start class with knob completely loose.
6pm: We start warming up. We also do some arm stretching while on the bikes. Arm stretching? I’m wearing a tank top and I can’t remember if I shaved my armpits this morning.
6:05: I’m already looking at the clock, but I’m pretending to stretch my neck, hoping no one will notice.
6:10: I’ve officially made it 5 more minutes than I did last time. I consider myself a total rock star.
6:15: My spleen is hurting, or is that my liver? Oh, and I just threw up in my mouth a little.
6:20: I realize it’s one of my incisions that’s hurting. What if the incision bursts open and my implant falls out? OMG. It’s totally possible.
6:25: I’m watching this old bitty in front of me to the right. She’s wearing a polo shirt, but she also has the professional bike shoes on. Her outfit makes no sense. The shoes say hardcore, the shirt says WTF?
6:30: The girl behind me snaps her gum. I remember the gum that I stuck in my sports bra when I changed my clothes. Ok, that’s a little better. But, where should I put my gum wrapper? I decide to swallow it. Okay, I really didn’t.
6:35: Old bitty in front of me says she wants to do more “jumps.” This lady acts hardcore, but I can tell by the way she’s pedaling that her knob is totally loose. Bitch.
6:40: Chelie asks if anyone wants to do one more song or should we start our cool down? Everyone raises their hand for one more song. Hail Mary full of Grace… I start to wonder if there is a patron Saint of spinning.
6:45: We finally start to cool down. I thought class was supposed to be over now?
6:48: We’re off our bikes stretching our calves and I see the woman behind me texting on her phone. I consider beating her with my water bottle, but don’t have the energy.
6:50: Done! What if I can’t get out of bed tomorrow to take my kids to school? Oh well. They can miss one day.
I’m driving home and I remember something Shawn bought at the store last night.
12 comments:
Ha! This whole post cracks me up! I laughed so many times...
I was 'recommended' a spinning class a while back as a alternative to running but since I don't belong to a gym or anything I haven't tried it. Sounds a little TOO intense!
And that ice cream looks a little too good...I'm a sucker for anything mint chocolate. We have Dreyer's down here in Texas and I don't think I've seen that kind before. I've been getting the tiny little cups of Ben and Jerry's Mint Chocolate Cookie and it is SO good..
Okay..must stop thinking about ice cream..
THis post was absolutely hysterical! I think the same things go through my mind...you fight not to go...then you force yourself to go...then while your there you have to indulge yourself around odd people and then after alllll that you have to go home and try try to fight the urge to indulge. BTW...i def am a sucker for the mint choc chip and def would have said yes. I mean, after all you went through! You deserve it!!
No need to feel guilty...you worked hard..you deserve a little something special..
I couldn't be more annoyed right now by the bitty in the polo shirt, and I wasn't even there!
So...are you going back or what? What's the final verdict on spinning? Oh, and do you chew gum when you exercise now? I can't work out without it!
You'll find us eating dessert and watching BL tonight too...and not feeling guilty.
The Mint Chocolate ice cream was delicious girls!
Oh, and Hillary, the verdict is still out on spin. You should have seen the lady in the polo, it made me very very angry. And, yes, I generally chew gum when I work out now! Thanks for the great idea!
OMG! I can't believe you did it!!!
No need to feel guilty - you clearly earned the ice cream!
Side note: Is your boob ok?
That's awesome that you did it! That is one of those things that when are finished you think, well, I can cross that off my list of things to do in my lifetime! That ice cream looks D licious!
May I just say that your husband rocks. Not only does he purchase the ice cream in the first place, but then supports your eating it on account of you earning it. Where'd you find this guy?
OMG Tami why would you want to even get on one of those contraptions. I swear they are out of a science fiction movie. You are a dedicated exerciser, me I am a couch potato, but a happy couch potato.
Ok...this is just a test. But, is your boob ok?
Abbie/Heidi...I found him on the internet. Ha!
Linda, I would like to think I am a dedicated exerciser but my dedication comes in spurts. Being a couch potato is fun too though!
This post had me cracking up!! You are so darn funny!!
And...really...they make mint chocolate chip brownie ice cream? I have not seen that, but I will be looking for it!
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