Wandering Wednesdays

First, I must say I stole the idea of “Wandering Wednesdays” from Jenny Lee, who was one of my first followers.  She is absolutely gorgeous, and is a fitness fanatic (like me), so if you don’t know her, go check her out!

What is a “Wandering Wednesday?”  Well, from what I gather from Jenny’s blog, it’s posting a picture or pictures from the past.

I have a slide show of all my picture files on my desktop, and I saw these pictures pop up and thought they were perfect.

In a little over a week, my baby big girl will be 6 years old.  So, without further ado, let us wander back to November 7, 2004 and her 1st birthday party!  (And my 25th birthday, sigh, tear…)

To whom it may concern.

Dear Gap (and old lady working at the Gap)-

Why can’t you have clothing that is actually true to size?  Why do I take a skirt off the rack in my actual size, only to find that it is too big?  How can this be?  This is my size! 

Why when I ask the old woman (who probably had to go back to work because she lost all her $ in the stock market) working about the size discrepancy does she tell me “Yeah, well, that skirt is big.  I usually tell people if you’re a size 4, try on a size 2; if you’re a size 2 try on a size 0…and so on.” 

Ok, Miss-you-should-probably-actually-be-working-at-JCPenney…what if you’re a size 0?  Then, what?  I bet you never thought of that!  Do you have a size 00, if not in the store, maybe online?  What’s that?  You don’t?  And you want to glare at me because I even suggested it?

So, why is it that when I decided to check your website for my very own self did I find a size 00?  Yup, it’s right there.  Ha.  Well, now I don’t even want it anymore because now my husband will see me buying it online and I won’t be able to sneak it in from the mall incognito I am mad you, your store, and everyone affiliated with it.  Ok, except Banana Republic, they are affiliated with you, and I’m not mad at them, I heart them.

Sincerely,

Pissed off consumer who will probably be back to your store, even though I say I won’t

P.S.  Here is the skirt in question:

P.S.S.  Don’t bother commenting on how I’m complaining about a size 0.  Blah, blah, blah.  Do you know it’s actually 100 x’s harder to find smaller sizes than bigger ones?

Weekend Update

The girls got a 3 day weekend due to their school closing on Friday for decontamination! Friday morning we watched which we got from the trusty Redbox on Thursday during our emergency Listerine run. Who doesn’t love the Redbox?!

By lunchtime Lainey was starting to look a little rough, so when her fever got to 101 I decided to call the pediatrician to ask if she should be put on

They actually called in a script for both girls, since they were both exposed at school and Lainey was already getting sick. I sent Shawn to pick it up, but the pharmacy was all out, and the pharmacy tech basically said “Good luck with that!”

I probably would have called every pharmacy within a 100 mile radius, but luckily I found it on my 2nd phone call. Shawn went to get it and sheesh…it was $90 for both scripts! I don’t even want to know how much it is without prescription coverage. Did you hear that someone was selling fake Tamiflu online?

Saturday afternoon Lainey took a long nap and Alivia and I worked on her fire safety project, which almost drove me to drink. More on that in a second (more on the project, not on the drinking!).

Saturday night we decided we better get our pumpkin carving on, since Halloween is less than a week away…

Here is Lainey with Dad, we nicknamed them the “White team.”

Here are Alivia and I, we didn’t really have a team name.

(oh, and for those of you who were loving on my hat, I got it at the Gap Outlet for $5!)

And the finished product! It’s a Scooby-Doo witch, just in case you couldn’t tell.

Team White’s finished Tigger!

And both pumpkins together:

I think they turned out pretty good, we didn’t have anyone to judge our pumpkin carving contest, so in the end it was a tie.

Now, for the moment we’ve all been waiting for…

Drum roll please…

The finished “Fire Safety” Project:

This is the diagram of the inside of the house. All of the rooms had to labeled, smoke detectors had to be labeled, and she had to show 2 ways to exit the house from her bedroom. Yes, I drew the outlines of the rooms. I couldn’t help it, I had to. If she gets marked down for me doing that Shawn has agreed to tell her teacher, “Sorry, Alivia’s Mom has OCD.” Ha!

And now for the outside:

(which had to show the 2 exit plans, a “meeting” place, and a place to call 911)

Ta-Da!

I’d be lying if I didn’t say I’m hoping the teacher doesn’t mark on it, so we can save it and turn it back in when Lainey is in first grade!

Any Questions?

This is me:

This is me working on Alivia’s fire safety project:

(Side note, Lainey looks a little terrible, but this is actually better than yesterday when her fever was much higher.  Thank God, for the Tamiflu the doctor called in for both of them!)

This is me after white out, erasers, and 1 hour of fire safety:

Any questions?

Author note:  The wine in these photos was strictly used a prop, I would never sip wine while working on homework.  Seriously.

Let’s all take a deep breath…

Ahhhh…

 

Now, didn’t that feel good?

This is what I would like to say to some of the mom’s I have encountered the last few days.  Let’s all take a deep breath, and chillax.  Maybe we all need a good laugh too?

Over the last week the flu and H1N1 virus have totally invaded the area.  I got an email today saying my daughter’s school is closed tomorrow.  They have had two confirmed cases of H1N1 so far, and being that the school is so small, I’m sure a lot of kids were exposed.  The email also said the Health Department recommends we do not “get together” with any other children outside of school.  What?  Even if my kids are healthy?  Yup.  Great.  It didn’t give a time frame for this though.  How about a little more detail next time?

I debated whether I should tell the girl’s daycare.  I mean if kids get sick there, it’s not like it’s going to be traced back to us, right?  My kids aren’t even sick (yet).  Am I bad person if I don’t tell?  My main reason for not wanting to say anything is because I didn’t want to create drama.  On Monday when we were at gymnastics I heard some mom’s saying they were even keeping their children who weren’t sick home!  Seriously?  People are seriously freaking out around here. 

It doesn’t help that they keep flashing all over the news that kids are dying from H1N1.  I feel horrible for the children who have died, and I certainly don’t wish that on myself or anyone I know, but you can’t keep your kids in a bubble.  In our case, by the time we found out children at the school had it, my kids had already been around them.  There is Nothing. I. can. do. about. it.  If they get sick, we’ll deal with it.  But, in the meantime I’m not going to give myself even more grey hair stressing over it and checking their temperature every 5 minutes.

However, I admit I would be lying if I said I didn’t run to Meijer this afternoon to buy Listerine for everyone. 

I was so embarrassed that I was giving into the hype, I considered hiding the Listerine under my coat.  Luckily, I quickly realized this could be confused with shop lifting, and decided against it.  By the way, the Listerine is because I read somewhere gargling with it twice a day can prevent the virus from proliferating in your throat/nasal cavity.  Yes, I told you, I gave into the hype.  Don’t worry though, I didn’t steal any surgical masks from work!

Back to the daycare.  I decided to tell the director this afternoon when I picked the girls up.  She said “Ok, well, we’ve been sanitizing everything every night and luckily we haven’t had any sick kids yet.”  Ok, that’s great.  But, then I saw her go and tell Lainey’s teacher and the teacher looked at me like I’d just exposed everyone to an STD.  Ugh.

Proof that all men are perverts.

Picture this:

We are driving home from the grocery store.  My husband is majorly on my shit list after an incident earlier in the day.  He’s lucky we went to my brother’s house this afternoon, or there may have been a physical assault (on my part).  My kids are fighting.  Lainey’s voice is already like nails on chalk board due to the emotional breakdown she had during the entire shopping trip, which ended in a fight about who got to pick out band-aids.  Shawn just pulled over to the side of the road, going from 75mph to zero in like one second to retrieve a stuffed animal…

Me:  “Did you put that wine in the refrigerator last night?”

Him:  “Yes, it’s on the second shelf.”

Me:  “Good, because that’s all I have in life right now.”

Him:  “The only thing holding you together is that bottle of wine?”

Me:  “Yes, and you’re not getting any.”

Him:  “Don’t worry, I know.  I’m probably not getting any for like a month.”

 

Did he actually just say that?

 

Me:  “You shouldn’t be allowed out in public.”

Him:  “What?  Why?”

Me:  “I was talking about the wine.  I meant, you weren’t getting any of my wine.”

Him:  “Oh, yeah, me too, I was talking about wine too…”  (insert him laughing like Beavis and Butthead here)

 

Just another day in paradise.

Fancy Pants.

Near my work there is a small locally owned grocery store

It’s in one of the nicer areas of Grand Rapids, and the girls I work with and I have all deemed this to be a “fancy” grocery store.  You have to be fancy to shop there.  They check you out when you walk in to decide whether you’re fancy enough.  You can’t be wearing sweat pants, or carrying your faux Coach purse, and definitely NO muffin tops.  However, they will accept you if you’re wearing scrubs, because then there is a possibility you're a doctor.  So that, in and of itself, has gotten us in the door a few times!

I digress…

One of the girls I work with told me she made it past security the other day and was able to get in long enough to find this:

 

I’m not a huge fan of wine, but she said it has a little “bubbly” to it, which certainly piqued my interest.  When I left work I decided my Banana Republic top, jeans, and black heels made me posh enough to slide under their radar.

I found the wine, on sale for a mere $7.99, but then I started feeling like one of “them” and I wanted more.  I shopped around, realizing I looked a little like an alcoholic clutching my bottle of booze.  I ended up by the most beautiful display of Honey Crisp Apples.

They were so shiny that I actually wondered if they had a person there just to shine the apples?  Have you ever had a Honey Crisp Apple?  They are hands down the Best. Apple. Ever.  I think they should be named “Crazy Delicious,” you know like the “Red Delicious” apples?  Because that’s what they are, Crazy. Delicious.

As if that isn’t perfect enough, feast your eyes on this:

Are you kidding me?  Am I in heaven?  Seriously, who ever thought of this combination is a genius.  When I left the store with my purchases I was honestly trying to devise a way to dip a whole apple into the dip, take bites, and drive at the same time.  Turns out, it’s impossible. 

I had a work dinner tonight at 5, but left work at 4:30.  I had a half hour to kill, so I looked myself over and decided that I was, again, fabulous enough for Forest Hills Foods.  Did I want to chance it though?  Twice in one week?  What if they check my ID and see that I’m from Ho City.  I couldn’t help myself, the Honey Crisp Apples were calling my name.  Oh, and I also bought something else, but that’s a surprise!

Oops, I almost forgot to tell you my thoughts on

Well, I accidentally drank half the bottle the night I bought it.  I felt kind of like a lush, but the girl who recommended it to me told me she drank the entire bottle that night!  Ok, so I guess I won’t be on Intervention, at least not this week.

 

Coming out.

I have to tell you something.  I’m not sure, but some of you may have seen this coming.  I just ask that you be respectful of my decisions, and please don’t judge.

Are you ready?

My name is Tami, and…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Can you believe it?  It’s sort of an addiction.  I mean, right now (as I type this) I’m like seconds away from putting spin shoes on my birthday list.  Don’t hate me.

For those of you fellow spin haters, I have to tell you something.  Give it another try.  I think you have to try spin a minimum of 3 times, and throw up at least once to decide whether you like it or not.  That’s my story and I’m sticking to it!

Priceless.

Admission for 4 to Klackle Orchards:  $32.00

Leaving after 5 minutes to go to Wal-Mart for 1 fleece, 3 hats, 3 scarves, and 3 pairs of gloves because you listened to your husband when he said it was “warm” out, but it was actually colder than a well-digger’s ass:  $48.00

2 pumpkins:  $16.00

Apple Butter and Apple Bread:  $7.98

Getting your face painted,

  petting baby bunnies,

riding a giant rocking horse,

running thru a corn maze,

yelling at your Dad when he leads you to a dead end,

hugging your sister,

launching apples from a sling shot,having your 6 year old take your picture,

going on a wagon ride to pick apples,

munching on the apples,

seeing silly signs and trees starting to change color,

picking out your pumpkin,

watching your husband try to navigate the world’s tiniest shopping cart to the car through mud and pot holes without dumping the pumpkins,

  falling asleep in the car,

and laughing at your husband (while taking his picture) when you get home because he has to pee soooo bad, and the garage door is going up soooo slow:

 

PRICELESS.